Dear Brides:

If you listen to all the love songs through the years, love sounds so easy. It’s really easy to say, I love you, Baby. Falling in love is the easy part, it only takes two people with a pulse. Right? It’s the easy part. So why is it so hard to stay in love? The wedding was so awesome and honeymoon was fantastic, and they seemed so much in love.

It’s estimated there are over 1,500 organizations for the sole purpose of helping to bring couples together. With all that help, why is it so hard for people to stay together? Is it possible to stay in love when the national average is 50% for marriages to end up in divorce? And Christian marriages aren’t much better.

It’s estimated, children raised in homes with blended families, without dad, or parents are living together but not married will have a higher incidence of divorce as adults. It said that the best keys for a couple getting married is the kind of modeling they seen growing up, where the children experienced respect, encouragement, comfort, attention, support and security. Where they’ve seen their parents truly love one another.

Many couples believe you have to choose right, but I believe it’s learning how to become the right person. And our culture is against long-term marriage evident with the type of TV shows, movies, and porn available where ever you turn. And it’s becoming easier to cash in on the marriage and get divorced.

Jesus gave us the formula or foundation for a successful relationship and marriage. John 13:34 says, “I give you a new commandment: to love one another as I have loved you.” That doesn’t sound new to me, does it? What’s the catch?

The catch is, Jesus makes love a verb instead of a noun. He makes it a command, no matter what. 

Simply, love no matter what. Love regardless. Take the lead to love without conditions, like Jesus does. In other words, make love a verb!

I can relate to the idea of cashing in on our marriage. During the first eight years, we could’ve pulled the plug, if we hadn’t made love a verb with the help of Jesus. We will be celebrating 59 years this June, and we are still learning how to make love a verb.

Sometimes it’s too easy to get angry instead of biting your words and make love a verb. Sometimes it’s too easy to feel frustrated when you don’t feel respected. Sometimes you feel like reacting when you don’t feel loved or understood, but it’s all a decision of making love a verb.

Better yet, making love a decision no matter what. Or saying, “I will love you no matter what, even if you don’t deserve it.” Making love a commitment certainly isn’t easy, but it’s the better choice.

The idea is treating the other person above yourself, serving and making them your number one priority. Unconditional love is life changing!    

In other words, you have made love a verb and a commitment. True love becomes the focus and couples serve and enjoy one another.

But you might be asking, “Will they take advantage of me?” Maybe, but love without conditions, anyway.

Treat the other person like you did when you first dated. Remember how you naturally treated that person with great respect and worked hard to win their acceptance? It was easier to show you were interested in what she or he was doing. We were selling ourselves. We wanted to be involved. We wanted to understand.

Keep doing the same thing in marriage.

Let’s be honest. Making love a verb doesn’t mean you lose your power to share truth or to share your honest feelings. But, it’s sharing your true feelings with love and respect, so the other person will better understand your heart. It’s sharing your heart, so we can grow together in our relationship. It all starts with the decision to make love a verb.

God bless your efforts, 

Denny   

Featured Image by Mohamed Chermiti from Pixabay